DreamWorks

CHAMPION—May 16, 2011

           A little recollection of winter’s chill is just what Champions enjoy on the very edge of Spring.  A brisk breeze at a damp 52 degrees is just enough to spur genuine enthusiasm for the new season.  A chance visit to the Village on Thursday revealed some definite sign of multiple horses on the Old North Road right at Clever Creek.  It turns out that Bud Hutchison had his Spring Trail Ride on Wednesday and a glorious day it was.  Fifteen riders took their regular route and it was said that some were disappointed at the lack of press coverage.  Who knew?  After the fact, the report is of a lovely adventure. 

A cold Saturday morning found the little Temporary Annex over on the West side of the Square packed with customers/socializers.  A small place can easily fill up (axel deep on a Ferris wheel) as the regulars wash metaphorical hogs and describe scenes of border collies floating down the flood on mushrooms.  Warmer days will carry this rhetoric out to the Loafing Shed where it can be diluted adequately with clean fresh Champion air. 

          On Monday morning the space shuttle Endeavor took off on its final voyage.  Champions may not see immediate tangible benefits from the particle physics experiments known as the Alpha Magnetic Spectrometer but will not rule out the possibility.  Exciting things happen in Champion every day.  Some of the last of the Fox Creek Rodeo stock took their final voyage off to the sale barn in Ava during the week under the stewardship of the Young Farmer and his Uncle.  The initial loading of the animals was dicey, but no one was hurt, and the unloading and the sale were well executed.  The trouble came on the way back out on Highway 14.  Now the bridge there over the Bryant is an attractive span and well built if narrow by current standards.  The terminus of a steep hill and a sharp curve marks its Western approach so that Eastbound traffic has not much of a rear view but a good clear view of the road ahead and oncoming traffic.  This consisted of a truck at an appropriate distance to allow for accommodation of one rig on the bridge at a time.  Suddenly, as the Fox Creek Boys neared the bridge, there came roaring upon them from behind another outfit pulling an empty trailer.  Reckless speed and loose control had it careening about the road, narrowly missing the Champions and nearly forcing the oncoming truck off the road.  It all happened so quickly that there was scant time to identify the offensive vehicle, just enough for great sighs of relief and expressions of profound gratitude.  Tail-gating is nervous making and it is difficult not to speed up when someone follows too closely.  It also goes to say that even excellent drivers can be compromised by thoughtless others.  The other day, over at Lazy Lee’s in Norwood, a certain Smith Champion was pumping gas when another customer pulled into the bay quickly and stopped abruptly quite near just as Smith had completed his fueling.  He returned the nozzle to the pump and stepped hastily into his truck and slammed the door.  It was then that he realized he had sat himself in the back seat of his truck.  After a moment he stepped out, gave the lady in the little car a gentlemanly wave, and got in behind the wheel this time and left.  He told the story on himself, or no one would ever have found out. 

          The Fortnight Bridge Club met in Champion on Saturday night.  While the Vera Cruz player was off on the annual Audubon bird count, substituting for her was Champion Cookie from the East Side of Fox Creek, quite an able player.  The Norwood and Brushy Knob players both came in from the north and reported Cold Springs Road to be in quite good repair after the rains.  The play was sprightly with few errors in bidding or in the play—altogether a satisfying game.  Anyone looking to learn how to play bridge can visit with Linda over at the Plant Place in Norwood or can contact the American Contract Bridge League at www.acbl.org.  Find a link to that site in the Champion Connections section of www.championnews.us.  It is in the same section as Linda’s Almanac, which informs Champions that the 21^st and 22^nd will both be good days for planting root crops.  Linda has been playing bridge for a long time—decades—and still takes lessons.  Continuing to learn is a Champion endeavor.  Amy, a Norwoodian transplanted to Lee’s Summit, keeps up with Linda’s bridge playing through the Champion News.  She is a long time customer from back in the days when Linda was doing craft shows.  Now she pops into the Plant Place when she is home for a visit.  She also likes to shop at the “Army” and enjoys a good bargain.  It is good to know that the Champion News has an impact somewhere, helping to alleviate homesickness.  Describe your favorite bridge or your homesickness in a note to Champion Items, Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO 65717 or to Champion at getgoin.net.

          “A bridge to somewhere” is the title of an article written by Tom Sileo in a weekly column called The Unknown Soldier.  He makes a point to acknowledge the many U.S. service members who make the extra effort, despite risks, to give children caught in war zones a bright spot in their difficult days.  As they frequently hand out candy and toys to kids in the villages, they believe that showing kindness and compassion to innocent people oppressed by totalitarianism and terror is part of their duty.  Champions hope that kindness and compassion will extend to those soldiers upon their return home.

          The blooms of that magnificent Forsythia in Wilburn and Louise’s yard have given over to dense foliage now, but the pink and red roses on the archway over their gate are just as amazing.  They hardly look real and Champions slow down as they pass just to gawk at them. “Slow down, you’re moving too fast. You’ve got to make the morning last.”  That is from the 59^th Street Bridge Song where they are “Looking for fun and feeling groovy.”  They are headed in the right direction—to Champion—Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—May 9, 2011

          Mother’s Day in Champion was a beautiful day.  That old adage about if it rains on Easter Sunday it will rain the next seven Sundays in a row did not play out and with enough rain in Champion’s bucket already, it was easy to concentrate on Mom.  The roadways, the phone lines, and the Internet were all humming with activity and matriarchs are satisfied that their offspring appreciate them.  Special visitors to the Loafing Shed brought contented smiles to some Champion mothers. As an Old Champion woman thanked a favorite young man for his good wishes for her on that day he said,  “You know we have Son Day every week and I never get a card from you.  You could slip a five dollar bill in one while you’re at it.” 

          The big blowout at the Vanzant Community Center was a terrific success.  Tom Hicks is to be commended for his outstanding cookery –such brisket!  The music was delightful.  There was a packed house for the auction and the grounds were crowded with friends new and old visiting and enjoying one of the first such outings of the social season.  Norma Shannon enjoyed watching her grandson do a splendid job with the auction.  Pie bidding was fierce though a competitor finally let up just a little so the sheriff could afford one of Esther’s pies (thinking, no doubt, that he might enjoy a little ‘consideration’ himself off in the future).  The constabulary was well represented with two handsome young uniformed officers, the sheriff in plain (but appropriate) clothes and an undisclosed number of undercover officers all alert to the reputation of the General who seemed to be everywhere at once but did not seem to cause too much trouble.  Proceeds from the event will go toward maintenance of the facility and toward supporting the summer picnic—another excellent enterprise.   A public meeting will be held on the 20^th at seven in the evening to celebrate and summarize the success and to address new business. 

          One of the charming aspects of this get-together and the others like it around the country is the genial overlapping of so many circles. Someone asked how many of those attending were related to each other.  The connections go back so far and so deep that they are lost in the great circular collective briar patch of the local families’ tree.  Other circles are comprised of those newcomers, who may have lived here thirty or forty years, but whose parents were not born in the neighborhood, and newer newcomers who may have just lived in the area a few months or a few years but who have found a feeling of community and acceptance in this lovely part of the world.  Even with all the new people, the area is still not as densely populated as it was seventy-five years ago, so there is plenty of room for good neighboring.  It is a Champion kind of notion—even way over in Vanzant! 

          Champions are not oblivious to the suffering of those tornado victims in the South and East and to those being flooded out by the big rivers to the East and to the drought stricken people in the South and West.  Breadbaskets are being stressed all over the country and fuel prices will only add to the expense of putting a good meal on the table.  When Champions offer thanks for their food, they do it with humility and with compassion and consideration for those less fortunate, which includes most of the rest of the world.

          Ms. Eva Powell seemed to be having a good Mother’s Day and was pleased to report that Ronnie Thompson and that nice bunch from over at the County Shed in Drury had been working on the North end of her road.  It needed a lot of rock and gravel and they are doing an excellent job of getting so many miles of county roads back in shape after all the rain.  They were well represented over at the pie supper Saturday night and everybody is always glad to see them coming.  

          A great number of people gathered to mark the passing of Champion Dain Lambert on Thursday.  He lived his whole life here and made many friends.  His deep roots are shared and carried on by a family that will forever miss him. 

          “Build a house by the side of the road and be a friend to man.”  That is what Bob Jett did and his many friends will be saddened to learn of his passing on Saturday morning.  He had been expecting to go for some while and his grace and humor at the prospect was something that gives pause to anyone contemplating mortality and fearlessness.  His dear ones left behind are happy for every moment they had with him.

          Friends are off to Arkansas to visit with the Dalai Lama.  They say that being around him is like when your Dad reached out to steady you when you were learning to walk or to ride your bicycle.  A steadying hand is a gift.  He says to be kind whenever possible and that it is always possible.  He sounds like a great guy.  He shares his birthday with another great guy, Darrell Haden who has deep Douglas County roots.  Mr. Haden will be 80 on July 6^th.   The Dalai Lama will be 76.  Haden and his wife, Betty, live about twenty miles from the Mississippi River in Tennessee, and he responded to Champion inquires as to his well being with a lovely phone call.  He says things are going well for him and his family and he agrees with a Champion husband that the mushroom tales coming out of Champion are approaching Paul Bunion status.  He is the writer of “The Headless Cobbler of Smallette Cave” as well as other entirely reputable pieces and his opinion matters.  However, the photograph of young Colton and Wyatt Marler with that huge red beefsteak mushroom that Clint Marler found last week proves they can get big in these parts.  It took both those boys to hold the thing and it is pretty sure the Marler’s had enough to share. 

          Share whatever you have plenty of with whomever you like.  Share your thoughts and news at Champion Items Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO 65717 or at Champion at getgoin.net.  Get an eyeful of the progress over on the North Side of the Square in Historic Downtown Champion, well situated on the broad banks of Fox Creek down at the bottom of the hill just where the pavement ends.  Peruse that progress at www.championnews.us where you can also read excerpts of the famous Headless Cobbler story and get a look at Linda’s Almanac.  It says that the 13^th of May all the way through the 16^th will be an excellent time to plant corn, beans, peppers and the like, and then the 17^th will be good for root crops, leafy vegetables and seedbeds. It will be a good time to get those tomatoes out for people in frost pockets.  Sing, “I’ve got a pocket full of sunshine,” or  “It’s good to touch the green, green grass of home.”  Champion! —Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—May 2, 2011

        Monday morning finds Champion damp again and still grateful.  The world around Champion has changed again and Champions stay grateful for domestic tranquility, the common defense and the wonderful Constitution.  Huzza!  Love and Gratitude goes out to Navy Seals and all those serving the Nation.

        Burning plastic.  If you can smell it, it is getting into you.  Now some people (BK) will roll their eyes at this, but research shows that the fumes from burning plastic bags and water bottles are full of dioxin and cyanide and other chloride toxic fumes.  Must a person be exposed to these poisons over an extended period of time to suffer ill effects?  What about the effects on children, and future children?  It is easy enough to develop a new habit.  If recycling is not an option, there are still ways to deal with the excess of plastic in the modern life that do not require burning.  Neighbors burning plastic may or may not respond to a request to desist, but a friendly conversation might produce positive results and at the very least a person can take responsibility for his own actions.

        Mail carrier, Karen Goss, is a real Champion.  She keeps Champions connected to the rest of the world, to family, friends, creditors, and the news regardless of the weather.  She has recently enjoyed the welcome company of her daughter and family down from North Dakota.  They like to come this time of the year to help get the garden in.  Granddaughter Toni is five years old, grandson Gavin is eight and the baby,  Noah, is five months old.  Their last name is Owens and they are from Minot, N.D. where their Dad is stationed in the military.  They had a nice visit for a couple of weeks and many good memories were made, also some very tasty plum jelly by mother, daughter and granddaughter.

        Those fine fellows on the road graders from the County Shed over at Drury are doing a splendid job of getting the roads back in order after all the rain.  Champions say, “Thanks, fellows!”

        John Moreau was a newcomer to Champion and only lived here for a short while.  He passed away in February.  On Sunday afternoon about fifty friends and family gathered in the lovely pavilion at Noblett Lake to celebrate his life and to share their memories and feelings.  It was drizzly, wet and cold but the spirit of the celebration was warm and light hearted as many told stories and shared new information about their old friend.  He is missed but still very much in their midst.

        The official rain total for Champion for the Easter Week deluge was 12.2 inches.  That was before the May Day Rain.  One prominent Champion out on a tour of the country, as he is want to do during all kinds of weather, found himself hard up against a creek too deep and fast moving to cross.  Just as he was backing up to turn around a tremendous mushroom fell across the road behind his truck.  The phenomenal rain and sudden sunshine caused the monster fungus to emerge so quickly and staggeringly huge that it became top heavy and toppled over with a thunderous crash!  Stunned, and speechless (for a change) the Champion finally caught his breath and stepped up to examine the thing.  The stem was so large he could not reach around it with both arms.  The crown would have made a suitable bivouac had he been interested in holing up for a spell.  As if in a spell, he staggered to his truck, extricated his handy hand ax and commenced to chop his way through.  It was the find of a lifetime, and still, he has not enough mushroom to share. 

        Nonresident Champions, Richard and Kaye Johnston celebrated their thirty-fifth wedding anniversary the other day.  They reprised their outing of three years ago by taking fourteen other Upshaws with them on an outing to Dalton, Arkansas, where there is an Upshaw Cemetery replete with a Revolutionary War Veteran.  They visited the museum in Pocahontas, Arkansas where there is family memorabilia preserved for posterity.  Generally speaking, much fun was had and since the Old General was along for the ride, it is clear that there was much fun and foolishness afoot.  Other nonresident Champions fled the flood back to Illinois but may come back soon to get their little chores done.

        The Vanzant Community Center will have its first Pie Supper of the season on Saturday night.  Supper starts at six in the evening and then the auction will begin.  There will be surprises.  How many pies and what kind will Esther make this year?  Bidding is likely to be fierce and exciting.  This evening will be dedicated to getting the Vanzant Picnic off the ground.  It is always one of the highlights of the summer and Champions generally look forward to it.  (The General seems to be Everywhere.)

        The rain will let up by the middle of the week and even Champions in frost pockets can get a good start on their vegetable gardens.  Linda’s Almanac for May is available on line in the Champion Connections section of www.championnews.us, at The Plant Place in Norwood and for perusal on the refrigerator in the Temporary Annex on the West Side of the Square in Downtown Champion, just across the avenue from the Re-creation of the Historic Mercantile/Emporium located on the very spot that was once occupied by the beloved old building.  It is rapidly approaching completion, though ‘rapid’ is a subjective term.  Globally speakin, it is moving pretty fast.  “When boating, never quarrel, for you’ll find without a doubt, a boat is not the proper place to have a falling-out.”  Sing the chorus if you know it, and wipe the mud off your feet before you dirty up Champion—Looking on the Bright Side.

CHAMPION—April 26, 2011

        Champions are keeping their heads above water and glad of it.  They are glad for the rain and have no complaints.  The bridge over Fox Creek just to the East of Downtown Champion is well underwater and likely to stay that way for a while.  The low water crossings North of town on County Roads 239 and 237 are impassable but Champions do not feel marooned.  Monday morning found the Temporary Annex of the Historic Emporium full of people to overflowing and if there were flies on the walls (which there are not) things might have been learned that would shed light on many mysteries old and new.   By the end of the day the flood had reached the lower drive, but during the night receded.  A quick flash of sunshine Tuesday morning lifted spirits uniformly around Champion.  Even a small amount of sunshine is most welcome. 

        A mystery was solved with a phone call on Sunday when Bob Berry called Esther Wrinkles to confess having left the big bag of mushrooms hanging on her front door while she was away.  It took her three sittings to eat them all and she said they were really good.  Some people have very nice neighbors.  Esther is getting excited about the pie supper to be held at the Vanzant Community Center on May 7^th.  She says that there will be much more information coming out about it, but that people should start planning on attending now.  

        Champion’s Easter Parade was a wash this year.  Bright spots, however, were visitors Vivian Floyd and entourage meeting up with the Illinois Kriders, Harley and Barbara.  Together with the Champion regulars they made for a lovely if damp Easter.  Good Easter email wishes came from Bob Conrad, Al Nance, and Pete and Kate Proctor who sent a very interesting article about the entertainer Martha Ray.  It turns out that she was a full “Bird” Colonel in the US Army Reserve and a nurse with surgical specialty.  She is the only woman buried in the Special Forces Cemetery at Ft. Bragg.

        The woods are filling in so fast that the dogwoods are beginning to disappear while still in full bloom.  Garden peas are growing inches by the day and potatoes are almost leaping up out of the ground. More than one experienced gardener voices concern that things might rot in the ground, but others remain optimistic that even if that were to happen there is still time to get a good garden in.  Gardening is not altogether inexpensive, though the greatest cost is in labor, but food prices are such that some who have never tried it are giving it a go this year.  Linda’s Almanac from over at the Plant Place in Norwood shows that the planting will be good all the way through the 29^th of the month for those root crops.  Look for her almanac on line at www.championnews.us and while you are there look at the photo of the elegant new steps leading up to the Recreation of the Historic Emporium on the North Side of the Square in Downtown Champion sprawled lavishly along the wide and wild banks of Fox Creek.  “Oh! The night was dark and stormy.  The air was full of sleet.  The old man stepped out in the yard and his shoes were full of feet.”  Finish that song if you can or send your favorite weather song to Champion Items, Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO 65717 or to Champion News.  Take the only open road into town and get an eyeful of Champion—Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—April 17, 2011

        The good news in Champion has to do with the whippoorwills and the hummingbirds.  These are the sure harbingers of Spring and are as welcome as would be gift of a dozen mushrooms the size of pop cans.  The hummers will be here in force before long as the ‘scouts’ have been here for a couple of weeks now.  Many Champions keep feeders out for them and find them fascinating to watch.  They use the sugar water and flower nectars to fuel their astonishing metabolism and for protein and other nutrients they eat soft-bodied insects and spiders!  Some suggest setting out some overripe fruit or banana peels to attract flies for the hummers, but most folks in the country have enough flies to share already.  It would be nice to let them in the house to go on spider patrol, a Champion idea if unrealistic.  Articles found at hummingbirds.net indicate that red dye is not necessary to attract the birds and that it may be harmful to them.  They can live a long time.  Some say the average is three to four years, but some species have been documented to live for twelve years.  Champion!

        When Champion seamstresses of a certain age were learning to sew, it was customary that the nap of a fabric such as velvet or even some corduroys should go from the top down.  That is to say a person wearing a velvet shirt should be able to stroke the sleeve from the shoulder down to the elbow had have it be smooth.  Conversely, stroking against the grain or nap from elbow to shoulder would produce a rough sensation.  Sometime during the past forty years things have changed. Now almost any velvet garment a person can buy has the nap running up.  It is suggested that as long as all the individual pieces in the garment run in the same direction it does not matter.  To be rubbed the wrong way is however unpleasant.  It seems that it is easy enough to rub someone the wrong way without trying.  Champions expend good effort to maintain their friendships.  Some other old Champions think that nap is their afternoon snooze and are definitely badly rubbed if disturbed.

        Champions are grateful for having missed out on the recent bad weather that has caused such death and destruction on either side of them.  Spring is an especially volatile time weather wise, though this part of the world has experienced tornadoes in every month of the year.  Sympathy for those suffering goes along with humility concerning good fortune.  April has been designated as the Month of the Military Child by the VFW.  Governor Nixon signed the proclamation acknowledging the military child as a source of pride to Missouri and recognizing the children of Missouri National Guardsmen for their sacrifices and the challenges they endure as their parents protect the state and nation as well as provide humanitarian relief around the world.  In celebration the Missouri National Guard’s Family Warrior Support group has scheduled events and activities throughout the month.  Look for details at http://vfwwebcom.org/missouri.  A link can be found to this VFW site at www.championnews.us.  Look for Linda’s almanac there too.  It says that the whole of the Easter weekend can be given over to planting root crops.  Champions in frost pockets know that there is still plenty of time to get a good garden in.  It may be too early to plant out those delicate things, but the soil can be readied.  There is never a shortage of things to do in a pretty garden.  They say if you see a pretty garden, there is generally someone in it.  Around here it will be a Champion.

        Esther Wrinkles reported a great meeting last Friday over at the newly renamed and reorganized Vanzant Community Center.  Sybil Gheer will be pleased to know that the first Pie Supper has been scheduled for May 7.  Everyone is welcome come and to bring a pie or any other good thing for the auction.  Esther said that J.W. Collins and the young Shannon auctioneer will be doing the honors that evening so it should be a lot of fun.  She has a sign up in her dining room that says “Pie Fixes Everything.”  The community center needs a little fixing up and that is the purpose for the proceeds of the evening.  It will be a great kick-off for the Spring and Summer Social calendar, so mark it down and show up to see old friends and to make new ones.  Champion!  (Vanzant really.)

        That other Tennessee boy has been in the neighborhood visiting with his Grandmother.  He has brought his banjo and his good humor to help Champion stay on the bright side.  His younger cousins will be swarming around him because he is so much fun and his great uncle Harley has made a trip from Illinois in time to coincide with Dillon’s visit.  He has what is called a magnetic personality.  He will have to leave before the Easter Parade in Champion but he will not consider himself to have missed much.  Perhaps next year he and his other great uncle, The General, will have a marching banjo-accordion duet worked up for the parade.  “Here comes Peter Cotton Tail hopping down the bunny trail.”  Hippity hoppity on in to Champion singing your favorite song, maybe that one about your Easter Bonnet with all the flowers on it.  Send any news of Champion interest or examples of “therein lies the rub” to Champion Items, Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO 65717, or to Champion News.  Enjoy a pleasant stroll around the Square in Downtown Champion—Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—April 11, 2011

        Champions are pleased for the rain, pleased for the good company of friends and family visiting, pleased for the progress in their gardens and various other enterprises.  Overall the Champion neck of the woods is quite a pleasing place full of the glories of spring and happy people.

        A good neighbor reports that Wes Smith cut his hand while working on a hay wagon and the next day cut his other hand working on same project. Pat came along with some duct tape and fixed him up.  The good neighbor plans a trip out to buy the Smiths a nice first aid kit.  That is always an appropriate gift and just having one on hand often reduces the need for it.

        The joys of spoonbilling were revealed to Adam Michaud when Big Bill Long took him fishing down at Lake Taneycomo recently.   Bill was busy Sunday sharing photographs of Adam and the monster thirty-five pound fish he caught.  It will take a lot of people or a lot of time to get it all eaten, though a project like that can sometimes gather a surprising amount of support.  Bon appetite!

        A swaggering local Champion allows as how he has been finding mushrooms the size of pop-cans.  Until he has shared some of those finds around sufficiently it will be assumed that the cans he is talking about are all those blue ones along the roadways a large number of which he has most likely single handedly emptied himself. 

        Champions are all glad to see that Ms. Eva Powell is feeling better over a recent illness.  Her spirits were much lifted by a visit from Granddaughter Emily with her husband Victor Ash and Eva’s great grandchildren Salina and Conner.  Conner has just had his third birthday and it is amazing to see how quickly the little ones seem to grow.  Pictures on The Dairymaid website show Taegan (Peanut) Krider to be in the middle of growing up herself.  It may be that parents are not really aware of the speed of change in their babies because of their constant exposure, but let a couple weeks go by and they seem to have jumped up in size and ability.  Very interesting this human condition!  Find The Dairymaid in the links section at www.championnews.us. 

        One of those Tennessee brothers is visiting with his Grandmother on the farm for a few days.  Cousins Foster and Kalyssa think that Dakota is the cat’s meow.  This part of the country is full of first and second, near and distant cousins and so the isolated folks with no blood kin nearby just look at the intertwining local family trees as a charming briar patch.  Family closeness is lovely to view even if it is not ones own.

        An Old Champion was visiting with Esther Wrinkles on the phone Saturday. He reported that she wants to be sure that the news gets out so that everybody will know about the meeting at the Vanzant Community Building on the 15^th.   It is to be held at seven in the evening and everybody is welcome to attend.  Maybe Sybil Geer will go.  A chance for conversation with her on Election Day is one of the reasons some Champions vote at all.  She is excited to learn about when the first pie supper will be at the Vanzant Community Building.  She said that she had enjoyed her time teaching there when it was called Clifty Hall.  Ms. Geer seems to enjoy everything.  She always has a smile and a pleasant word and is always dressed to the nines.  She is about ready to put away her cowboy boots for the year.  She has many pairs and finds them perfect with her skirts for wintertime warmth.  On that day she was wearing white and silver snakeskin boots—very stylish.  Her fellow election official, Velma Schroeder, was sporting a shiny chrome walker as a prize for a fall that she had taken recently.  Hopefully she will be able to ditch it soon, but it is good to see her up and around anyway and happy to do her civic duty.  The single (and only) male on the election board kept his cap pulled pretty low over his eyes to disguise his nodding off.  He must have some enterprise going somewhere that keeps him worn out.  Sue’s tie-die is not really a uniform, but like her, it is always bright and cheerful and while the community would still recognize her in other clothes, it would be a bit of a puzzlement to them.  “Hmmm, “ they would say, perhaps a little confused wondering what was different. 

        Email from Pete Proctor includes some nice photos of Pete, his son Bryan, and their friend, Patriot Rider Jerry England.  In honor of Bryan and the many deployments he has served, England put seventeen US Flags up on Pete’s street and driveway when this Champion came home recently to visit his parents.  Pete says that Bryan will be going to Qtar in May for a year’s deployment there.  Champions wish him all the best and are grateful for his service, and for Pete’s.  Vietnam era Veterans are the group about Pete’s age now, about ready for Social Security and some are still dealing with things they experienced those long years ago over there.  It is common to say, “Hate the war not the warrior.” Whatever the policies or reasons for the various conflicts going on around the world currently, those serving and those who have served are the reason the Viet Cong or others are not headed up Champion driveways.  So, thanks.

        A Saturday trip down to Vera Cruz for the Fortnight Bridge Club meeting had the group dazzled by the dogwoods and delighted by May apples and bloodroot.  What a glorious place and glorious time of the year!  The Vera Cruz host was the winner with Champion second and Brushy Knob third.  Linda, representing Norwood, brought home the nickels this time, which probably brought her losses down to about thirty-five cents.  That is not expensive entertainment by any standard.  The play, the refreshments, and the good company all meet the highest standards for a really good time.  Champion!  Between hands garden plans and progress were discussed.  The Vera Cruz and Champion players are both in frost pockets, while Brushy Knob and Norwood are at a higher elevation and can generally get their tender things in earlier.  Linda says business is picking up at The Plant Place and people are getting excited about growing food.  Her Cole crops are looking good and she has just transplanted lots of tiny tomatoes.  In Champion it is generally figured that the last frost is May 10^th.  That seems a long way away, but it will go by quickly.   The weather man seems to indicate that Champion might get a frost on the coming week end, so patience will be the requirement for those ready to jump the gun.  Get a copy of Linda’s Almanac over at the Plant Place or at Henson’s Store currently located in the temporary annex on the West Side of the Square in Downtown Champion.  Old timers will verify that following the signs is a good way to get there.

        A big pile of new treated lumber was noticed over the weekend kind of stuck up under the porch of the recreation of the historic emporium.  Nobody was around to explain its purpose so Champions are left to speculate.  One is singing, “I’ll build a stairway to Paradise with a new step every day!  I’m going to get there at any price, stand aside, I’m on my way.” That particular Champion has no rhyme (and hopefully no rime) or reason for what she sings.  So, pay no attention to her or to that man behind the curtain.  Be a Champion—Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION —April 4, 2011

        A review of the first week of April over the last five years reveals the following:  Good news in Champion (April 9, 2007) is that Spring is back Again!  During the course of the week assessments will have been made about the degree of freeze damage to trees and shrubs, though the full extent may not be evident for some time.  Some are hoping for a second mushroom season to follow the second winter.  All are optimistic about something.  It is just the Champion mind-set to look ahead with expectations of a favorable outcome.  On April 6, 2008, there is a rumor in Champion that dogwoods are blooming!  By the time this goes to ink it may be so in a widespread way.  May Apples are up two or three inches high and mushroom hunters have begun to gather ticks already.  There is a great rivalry to claim the first and most of anything among Champions.  They can’t help it.  April 6, 2009, said that April slipped in to Champion as quietly as the March lamb left and all was springly sweet and pleasant those first few days.  T.S. Elliot was right though when he said, “April is the cruelest month, breeding Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing Memory and desire, stirring Dull roots with spring rain.”  Mr. Elliot wrote his poem, “The Waste Land,” in 1922, and it lives up to its name with some very dreary imagery.  Clearly, he was not from around here because even the brutal cold winds of those next few days with threats of snow and frozen flowers did not frost the spirits of Champions though they may have been picking ticks from their long handles.  On April 5, 2010, Champions, alert to the inevitability of change, welcome it with the same ease and grace with which the seasons come and go.  Even so.  Let it be.  The genuine heart of Champion does not change, however, the part that acknowledges the importance of good neighbors and good deeds and that part that recognizes and celebrates the beauty of the place.  So on April 4, 2011, everything is the same–beautiful and full burgeoning growing things and full happy hearts.  Not boring—Champion!

        The Barren Fork Traditional Muzzleloading Association bunch will host the spring Rendezvous April 16^th and 17^th over north of Gainesville.  Participating campers will reflect the 1640-1840 time period in their costume and camp gear.  Visitors are welcome to come and look around.  Ed Peterka has all the particulars and can be reached at auntiem@getgoin.net.  What an excellent opportunity for young folks and the rest of us to get a look at how things were back in the old days.  It took some sturdy individuals to thrive during those times and to raise families that raised families that are Champion families today.  Time is a fluid concept.  Dillon Watts will have his birthday on the 12^th.  He will have to have a belated Champion party as his spring break is slow in arriving this year.  Bob Berry will celebrate on the 14^th and all his Champion friends will be ready to shake his hand to say, “Wow!  You sure don’t look that old!”  He and Mary will most likely be at the Vanzant Community meeting on Friday night, so that will be a good chance to glad hand a nice man.  That meeting will inform the public about the situation, condition, etc. of the community building and plans for the future.  Everyone is welcome—7 p.m.  Income Tax Day finds George G. Jones another year older if unchanged from his flamboyant youth.  Taegan’s Uncle Dusty and her great Aunt Vivian will share the spotlight at different parties together on that day too.  That is on Friday and so is liable to be a blowout.  Packing heat and partying hearty, that whole outfit might as well be called the Wild Bunch.  There is a good chance that Harley and Barbara will be down to enter the fray and they will be considered to be a sight for sore eyes.  Maybe Barbara will have a preview of her Spring collection!

        It is reported that there are 3,060,000 people in the U.S. military and reserves, accounting for less than two percent of the population of 305,816,827 people.  Other sources say less than one percent of the population is currently serving.  Whether it is less than two percent or less than one percent, three million people are still quite a few.  It is wonderful that the Constitution can be supported and defended so well by so few.  There are 25.2 million veterans who have done that defending for the rest of the population and the Veteran’s Administration says that on any given night there are 107,000 homeless veterans.  Just knowing the numbers is not really much help.  Anyone wanting to show Love and Gratitude to a Veteran as a friend or a stranger can contact the local Veterans organizations.  The VFW posts and the American Legion have numbers in the phone books and avenues of direct support to Veterans in need.  Champion!

        Research into early April in Champion’s recent years unearthed this from 2007: “All over this part of the country the forsythia is in full bloom.  There are many beautiful examples of it but perhaps none so lovely as the one in Louise and Wilburn’s front yard.  It is not as large as some, but for overall beauty it is without compare.  It is so wonderfully symmetrical and each blossom seems especially large and well formed.  The branches all spring from a center core and arch themselves upward and outward like a mellifluous gilded fountain.  The open spaces uniformly highlight the perfection of each flowered bow.  Like Louise and Wilburn, it is a Champion!”  Louise says that it is just that pretty again this year but she allows as how Judy Hutchison, her sister-in-law, over west of C Highway has one that is truly magnificent.  This shrub is fairly easy to get started and pretty much takes care of itself.  Linda has some excellent specimens of it over at the Plant Place in Norwood and a wealth of information about it and most anything that grows.  Her Almanac says the 5^th, 6^th, 9^th and 10^th are all good days to plant crops that bear their yield above ground and they are all good for transplanting and planting flowers.  Find the almanac on the counter there or in the links section at www.championnews.us or posted on the refrigerator in Henson’s Store currently located in the Temporary Annex on the West Side of the Square in Downtown Champion just to the south of the Loafing Shed and immediately across the thoroughfare from the edifice that some say is surely most representative of the Golden Ratio.

        The 35^th Annual All Fool’s Formal was a grand success over at the Ace Café last Friday.  That is a spot over on the Far Side of Booger County and the place was simply jumping!  Judy T. Ing started the event back in the 1970’s and it carries on as a tribute to her and to all Champions everywhere with big hearts, love and tolerance for their fellowmen, and the willingness to get silly while still being good!  Send any kind of good Champion report to Champion News or to Champion Items, Rt. 2, Box 367 Norwood, MO. 65717. “Forget your troubles, come on get happy.  Sing your blues away.  Shout Hallelujah, come on get happy!  Get ready for the Judgment Day!”  Snap your fingers as you stroll around the Square.  It is Champion!  Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—March 28, 2011

        The wild unpredictable vicissitudes of Spring are not lost in Champion and Champions stand with bouquets of early flowers and optimism for the warm days ahead.  Mushrooms will be gracing certain tables and spring breakers will be out looking for more just to please a sweet grandmother…Meanwhile late Sunday night found fortnight bridge players driving home in the driving snow!  What a Champion kind of Spring!

        About forty people attended the meeting over at the Vanzant Community Building last Friday night.  President Bobby Emory and second fiddle, Robert Upshaw, have been joined on the board by secretary Debbie Stone, treasurer Debbie Shannon, and board members John Unger, Theresa Wrinkles and Brenda Massey.  They will have a board meeting all to themselves to assess the situation and hash out plans this coming Friday and then another public meeting on Friday April 15^th to inform the community of their findings and figurings.  The group has designated the 8^th and 9^th of July for the Vanzant Picnic this year, so things are moving along already.  An email came from Carmen McCarty with some good information about the old building.  It was called Clifty Hall School and the last school year there was 1967-1968 with Mrs. Cap (Verla) Wood the last teacher.  Clifty Hall was consolidated with the Mountain Grove School District then.  Ms. McCarty’s Dad, Claudle Lovan, was a bus driver for the little school as was Merle Kutz.  She thinks the only living teacher who taught there is Sybil Geer.  She remembers that they had a Clifty Hall Yearbook one year but she lost her copy during one of her moves. Perhaps someone will find an extra copy to share with her. 

        “You’ll never plow a field by turning it over in your mind,” according to an old Irish saying.  Linda’s Almanac from over at the Plant Place in Norwood says that the 29^th through the 31^st will be barren days, best suited for killing plant pests or to plow or cultivate.  The first and second of April will be good days for planting root crops, extra good for vine crops and to set strawberry plants.  These are also good days for transplanting.  It looks like the 5^th and 6^th will be good days for getting those peas in the ground for slowpokes who do not have it done yet.  Some old Champions have become so precious that they do not think they should be cold or uncomfortable in any way.  Fair weather gardening is still probably much better than no gardening at all.  A look at the prices in the grocery store might be enough to have them rethink their delicacy.  Find a copy of the Almanac on the website at www.championnews.us or over at the Plant Place or down at Henson’s Store currently located in the Temporary Annex on the West side of the Square. 

        “When?”  It is a much-asked question.  “Whenever” is as good an answer as is liable to be had. “Are we there yet?” the kid asks before the car is out of the driveway. Patience.  It seems that every week there is a family dispute concerning the spelling and meaning of a couple of words.  To finally set the record straight:  A “patient” in a hospital is often required to have “patience” with the red-tape and aggravations of being hospitalized.  Two people in the hospital are “patients” and must each also have “patience.”  English is a delightfully complex language.  It is always appropriate to correct the grammar of a child if it is done in a kind and instructive way.  Patience is always appropriate even when “When?” is over-asked. 

        Mr. and Mrs. Wesley Davis of Republic have had their nuptials celebrated Booger County style with much fanfare and delight of family and friends who wish them a long and happy life together.  It is lovely to see a young couple starting out well grounded and with the support and appreciation of a good community.  Congratulations!  Mozel tov!

        The struggle to stay on the Bright Side is less arduous in isolation.  When there is no distressing news of political unrest, natural disasters, unnatural disasters, and human suffering, it is easy enough to live that sweet Utopian (Champion) life—free of any contention, free of artificial flavorings and colorings.  The bright and flavorful citizens and environs of Champion have no requirement for dangerous and unnecessary chemicals.  Red 40, Yellow 5 and Yellow 6 are particularly onerous.  An editorial in the Washington Post reveals that the European Parliament requires that foods containing these chemicals must bear a label warning that the dyes “may have an adverse effect on activity and attention in children.”  There are cancer risks as well.  There are many vivid natural food dyes made largely from plant extracts that do not pose these threats, but using them requires costly and inconvenient reformulating of the food products—something that European manufacturers but few companies here have been willing to do.  Maybe the worst aspect of the whole food-coloring issue is that children are attracted toward brightly colored processed products that are high in calories but low in nutrients.  Champions recognize that there is an emotional connection between people and color and as citizens of the world, prefer to grow their food rather than to manufacture it.  Informed choices are Champion.  It all adds up over time like plutonium, which was the first man-made element produced in a quantity large enough to see.  Now they say that there traces of radioactivity in the rain in Champion.  It adds to the little piece of radioactivity from Chernobyl and all the atomic tests and bombs going back to White Sands, and all the mammograms and dental x-rays that do not shield the thyroid gland.  Even in the deepest hollows and the ‘fer backest’ hills there is no longer the option to be isolated.  So Champions accept their place as world citizens and will live the example of being good neighbors and friends, minding their own business and behaving.  One old Champion will try to stop using the word ‘sweet’ to mean good.  It is a start.

        Vivian Floyd was just about settled in to enjoy a Stained Glass Theatre production the other evening when the General abruptly appeared and demanded to see her ticket.  He seems to be everywhere at the same time and to Ms. Floyd’s credit she laughed right in his face!  She has a great laugh and Champions hope she will bring it down home one of these days soon.  Maybe she will be here for the Champion Easter Parade again this year.  The General is practicing walking and playing his accordion at the same time and if he can find someone to follow maybe he will not wander off into the brush this year.  They said that last year he was following the Spotted Hog.  If a gentleman is someone who knows how to play the accordion, but doesn’t, then what do you call a General who does not necessarily know how to play, but does?  Answer at Champion at getgoin.net.  His fans most often request him to play “Far Far Away.”   Sing what you like as you stroll around colorful Champion—Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—March 21, 2011

        Champions watched the Super-moon set on the first morning of Spring and saw the new season suddenly emerging in bright yellow forsythia and daffodils against deepening greens as the woods are thickening with swelling buds.  Dogwoods will soon be showing themselves and redbuds will pink up the woods in their own special way.

        Champions have lost a Champion.  Betty Shelton passed away on Monday the 14^th.  She was 77 years old and had been in ill health off and on for a long time.  She and J.T. have lived in downtown Champion for twenty-one years. J.T. grew up just a little east of Champion and Betty was from a little further east over by Bakersfield.  J.T.’s sister, Gladys, and her husband Jack Burchell have spent the week with him and Dennis Shelton came down from Iowa for a few days.  Betty had a good sense of humor and a great laugh.  She liked to be out and going when she could.  Her passing will not be unnoticed in Champion.

        Good news in Champion is that Connie is feeling very much better.  Louise took a moment away from her company to make the good report on Monday morning.  The company was Wilburn’s brother Manuel Hutchison and his wife Sue who were on their way back home to Lost Nation, Iowa.  They had a pleasant visit, which is the only kind a person could have at Louise and Wilburn’s house.  They are Champions.

        There is to be a meeting at 7 pm on the 25^th of the month over at the Vanzant Community Building.  The meeting is being called to elect board members for the administration of the building.  Currently Robert Upshaw and Bobby Dean Emory are the board and the organization is looking for new membership, additional board members and some interest, ideas, enthusiasm and help.  Sources close (very close) to the General say that he will be there with bells on.  It is unclear why he will, but once he gets something in his head it is Generally a done deal and having the General on one’s side is no small asset in any endeavor.  The Vanzant School last held classes there back in the 1950’s.  In recent years the building has been the site of many fundraisers and benefits for local people and people have held garage sales there and other events.  The annual picnic is always one of the highlights of the area.  The facilities are in need of some updating, but the soundness of the existing building and the good central location, good parking and good history make it well worth the effort.  Everyone is invited.  Esther Wrinkles said that Bob Berry and Mary Goolsby will be there and they live over on the other side of Twin Bridges!  So from far and wide, come and meet your neighbors and help out with a good cause.  There will be some Champions there for sure!

        “Desire trumps time.”  That is what one Champion told an acquaintance who is struggling still with the tobacco habit.  Twenty years later, not having had a cigarette in all that time, the urge is still there for the Champion and so there is weight to the words.  A young relative recently wrote that if you cannot change the thing that you do not like, change the way you think about it.  So a possible change might be to learn to enjoy the wanting.  Before, the smoke had been the reward for having finished something, the excuse for a break, and the solace for thought.  Now the little unfinished feeling, the little lack of something, the tentative uneasiness could be the end in itself.  To always be a little hungry is a good way to stay thin they say.  If the lack of something bad is indeed the same as something good then there is a star on which to hitch your wagon.  Wagons are typically easy places from which to fall, but Champions can always get back on.  The handle is on the bright side.  A while back someone wrote in to comment on the Old Champion’s rules by which to live.  Right after #2 “Be where you are” is “Have no unsustainable habits.”  (Previously, the rule had been written: “Do not get strung out on something you cannot have,” but it was decided that the vernacular was coarse and the new version has fewer syllables.)  Champions support each other in their struggles and apply another of the rules:  “Give us all a break!”

        Dillon and Dakota Watts go to different schools over there in Tennessee and, as it turns out, they have different spring break schedules, so there will be grandson on the Fox Creek Farm for an extended period of time—just not the same one the whole time.  It is not at all confusing to the family and the whole community gets a lift when they are around.  Cousins Foster, Kalyssa, Taegan (Peanut), Eli and Emerson Rose will all be looking for some fun with them.

        Some Champions are out getting their potatoes planted these first good days for below-the-ground crops.  Linda’s Almanac from over at the Plant Place in Norwood says that the 27^th and 28^th will both be good days for that kind of planting.  A few warm days can cause some to get ahead of themselves garden-wise.  It is easy to let the enthusiasm for the activity obscure the fact that May 10^th is considered to be the last frost date in Champion.  An extra big bunch of turnip seeds is going in the ground in the hope that Lem and Ned will show up about the time that some serious weeding will be required.  They are the daydream hillbilly boys that like the drudgery and dirty work that husbands are so often reluctant to do.  They work for practically nothing (a few turnips) and have gone to the Festus Haggen School of Convoluted Syntax and so are the dad blamedest most gentlemenliest and shore fired most eloquent spoke of airy a barefoot, loose limbed, lop eared, yeah-who that the likes of any of you plush bottomed rocking chair wranglin old scutters might ever have saw.  Enough said—surely.

        While Salem Sal was running the faro bank at the Ace Café, a rough customer became abusive toward her and was summarily dispatched by young Frank.  He then proceeded to rosin his bow and perform a funeral march.  This is the gist of the poem that the Old Champion hopes will be revealed in full at Champion Items, Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO 65717 or at Champion News. 

        The world is in turmoil with people struggling against natural and man-made disasters and against oppression.  Safe and secure at home in Champion, it would be easy to ignore the troubles of the world, but Champions know that the world has really become quite small and, on some level, what affects one affects all.  Love and Gratitude for doing what has to be done goes out from Champion to all those serving at the behest of the Nation.  Come home safely and soon to the people who love you.

        April 1^st is coming up quite soon.  It looks like it will be on a Friday this year.  It may be that the waiting will be over about then.  Champions who like waiting and enjoy that little unfinished feeling may be rewarded for their patience eventually.  The excitement is palpable and rather than run the risk of jumping the gun, Champions will bide their time, bite their tongue, hold their horses, keep their hand on the plough and wait.  Come hang around Champion for a little high quality waiting, but do not get in the way of progress.  Admire the beauty of it:  Champion—Looking on the Bright Side!

CHAMPION—March 14, 2011

        Champions have felt little earthquakes in recent weeks.  They are unsettling.  As tragedies unfold in other parts of the world, Champions take a moment to reflect on their relative security and their great good fortune.  An individual’s fate can turn on a dime, so can the fate of a nation.  Champions everywhere need not look far to find others in less desirable circumstances. 

        Sophia and Penelope are visiting their great aunt and even greater uncle in Champion and in a few short hours have collected rocks, transplanted tomato plants, made lots of music and have had dinner, cake and ice cream, good baths and a bedtime story.  They have plans for a great many other activities including a big bonfire, walks in the woods, and work in the garden.  Penelope Kay is five years old and attends the Little People’s Academy in Austin, Texas.  There are six people in her class and her teachers’ names are Miss Ariel and Miss Linda.  She is not a big fan of school yet, and finds all the writing practice to be boring.  She has a friend named Gio with whom she likes to play dinosaurs.  So far she has most enjoyed picking special rocks out of a big pile of gravel.  Sophia Lisbeth is a third grader at Henderson Mill Elementary School.  She says there are about twenty two students in her class, a few more boys than girls.  She says that they are given a lot of homework to do every night.  Reading is her favorite subject.  She particularly enjoys fiction and has read a number of books about a contemporary heroine, Abby Hayes.  She has been enjoying her time on the farm and especially transplanting the little tomato plants.  When asked about the likelihood of an earthquake happening in Texas she said, “It would probably not happen where I live, but I feel bad for the people in Japan now.”   She said that tornadoes are the things to worry about where she lives, but they have a good warning system there.  It is a long trip from their city to Champion, but many things are the same.  Champions keep their eyes out for tornadoes all year long and Champion hearts also go out to people in other parts of the world who are suffering in the dreadful disasters.

        Good neighbors over in Vanzant had a very successful fundraiser for Ed and Kristi Miller last Saturday night.  Ed had a heart attack back around Christmas and can no longer work.  Gwen Banks organized the deal and there was chili and hotdogs, music and a great auction, which included some beautiful items as well as numerous cakes and pies.  Sources said that pies sold for an average of about $20.00.  It is reassuring to know that neighbors will step up to help each other in difficult times.

        Word has arrived that Harley has visited the Hoover Dam and is home now thinking about it.  Perhaps by the time he gets back over to his old Champion home he will have digested all the sights and sounds that California had to offer him and will be able to make some cogent statement of his assessment.  It will be good to see that branch of the Kriders any time they show up.  Young Dillon Watts over in Tennessee is said to be making good progress from his ear surgery and since his physical activities are to be restricted for the next few weeks it might be an excellent time to practice his banjo!  Now there is a guy who knows how to utilize his time.  Miss Taegan Krider and cousin Foster Wiseman were notably absent in Champion on Sunday.  They are fighting bad colds and all their Champion friends and family wish them a speedy recovery. 

        When the ladies of the Skyline Auxiliary got together last week to hash over the results of their recent chili supper they were all well pleased with the results.  A few improvements were suggest for next year and pats on various backs were liberally assigned.  Donna Boyd will have received the “thank you—I’m sorry” card by now that acknowledges her tremendous effort as well as Paul’s hard work, and the apology from the Champion correspondent who called her “Tina” in the paper last week.  The card went on to say that a correction this week would be a chance to say, “Thanks again!”

        Times have changed as everyone knows.  A study shows that when there are fewer elders in a community they are more revered.  The nation is getting older and every day in America 10,000 people have their 65^th birthday.  Almost any one of them would say that when they were growing up if someone came into their mother’s house they were offered a cup of coffee, a glass of tea, or at the very least a drink of water.  That still goes on in some places, in some households, but Champions are cautioned not to have feelings hurt if it does not happen.  The times are changing.  Age is no more synonymous with venerability than faith is with virtue.  Champions are, by and large, charitable and friendly to strangers, helpful to the poor, sick and disadvantaged.  What a great place to live!

        It was good to see that the young soldier from Monette, Christopher Stark, had a memorial service seemingly free from disruption.  Hundreds turned out to honor him and his family and to stand in the path of that group of protesters who seem to exemplify faith but not necessarily virtue.  Champions extend Love and Gratitude to all those serving, all those who have served and all those who love and care for them.  The link has been changed in the www.championnews.us website so that a look to the VFW Post 3770 takes you to the national VFW site—well worth the look.

        Get out to that website to see some great pictures of Sophia and Penelope as well as that great link to the Dairymaid!  It is a most enjoyable read.  The old Champion lady is still looking for someone to respond with the rest of the words to “Fiddling Frank.”  Send them to Champion News, Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO, 65717 or to Champion News.  Get ready for a delightful exercise in waiting as the last few aspects to the Re-Creation of the Historic Emporium/Mercantile on the North Side of the Square in Downtown Champion come to fruition.  One day it will be as if it were always thus.  It will not be long after the big change until it will seem as if it has always been just like this.  What a celebration is in store for Champion!  Looking on the Bright Side!