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CHAMPION—November 26, 2007

        Champion is delighted that Charlee Smith came home from college for the Thanksgiving holiday.  She drives home every week end.  Wes says that they are treating her well over there and she is finding college to be a good experience.  She made it home Friday night and Saturday went deer hunting.  Champions know that she is a pretty remarkable person but when she killed two deer with one shot even some seasoned hunters are jealous.  The bullet went through the neck of one of the young deer and then trough the neck of the other killing them both.  So when a woman visiting Champion on Sunday said, “Hey!  Did you hear about that girl who killed two deer with one shot?” locals figured it must have been Charlee.

        This is the time of the year when Champions get a lot of good mail.  One of the more interesting pieces has come from Champion’s friend, Darrell Haden, from over in Tennessee.  He suggests a song, “The Hound Dog Song,” for the Missouri Song List which was thought to have been originated by a Douglas County man, Frank Reece.  He sent an excerpt of Senator J.E. Curry’s A Reminiscent History of Douglas County in which the Senator said of Mr. Reece:  “He was uneducated and poor, but was a real genius with the fiddle; could play any tune he ever heard, and play it ‘right now.’  At the same time he could carry on a conversation and laugh and talk as well while playing.  He could also sing and play at the same time, and this ‘dog song’ was one of his favorites.”  The song has enjoyed a number of permutations over the years.  The following version was taken from an album recorded by the American Indian artist, Buffy St. Marie in the 1970s.

        “Me and Lem Briggs and Orville Brown, took us a little walk to town.  My old Jim dog, ornery old cuss, he just naturally follered us.  When we got by Ben Johnston’s store, Raggs & Mop came out the door, yelling and screaming and throwing rocks, run my Jim dog under a box.  Now Jim seen his duty then and there and he let into them gentlemen.  He sure messed up that foot of square, with the rags and the meat and the hide and the hair.  Every time I go to town, the boys keep kicking my dog around.  Makes no difference ifn he’s a hound, you gotta quit kicking my dog around.”

        The line in the song about the ‘rags and the meat and the hide and the hair’ brings to mind the condition of the Champion square after the parade on Thanksgivings.  Mail has come about that too.  This one from Robert Upshaw from over in Vanzant.  He says, in part:  “I wish to extend my heartfelt thanks to the Champion Parade Committee.  What an awesome parade!!!  I wouldn’t be surprised that in a few years the Macy’s Parade will also be held at Champion.  I thought Barbara looked stunning in her new camel wool outfit.  Although I did think she was a bit overdressed, but, it was a chilly day.  And that armadillo hat with the racoon tail.  What a Clever Creek idea?  (Pun intended.)
        “As I didn’t want to drive in the congested traffic and get caught by the mobile toll booth, myself and 35 others rented the Vanzant community air shuttle bus blimp so we could view the parade from the air.  We sort of got lost and almost missed the parade.  Our navigator, Esther, had been partying on Thanksgiving Eve and couldn’t focus on the instrument panel.  But once we located Fox Creek all was well.
        “Although it was an outstanding parade, I do have one complaint.  After three years in a row you’d think the parade committee would get a different Grand Marshall.  That beastly porker from Spotted Hog, with all those rings in its nose, has got to be disbanded.”

        Champion is such a hospitable place and known for it’s open door policy with all its neighbors.  With that in mind, the CPC has decided to hold a special meeting to discuss the shameful incident that left the square in such a mess and to allocate responsibility for the veterinary bills.  It has been suggested that at the very least a moratorium should be in place that prohibits the participation of all pigs in future Champion Parades for an undetermined period of time.  That seems quite harsh and it is hoped that when tempers cool and the square is back to normal and some of the hurt feelings are assuaged, perhaps a more moderate approach to the problem can be found.

        Mr. Upshaw goes on to say, “P.S.  I think I located Doug Hutchison’s pet rock that Lonnie Krider misplaced a few years ago.  However, I could not be sure as it was partially covered with leaves and deer droppings.”

        Jon Martin, 33, a staff sergeant in the U.S. Army from Belleveu, Ohio died on Thanksgiving day in Germany as a result of injuries sustained in an IED blast in Iraq.  He is one of 3,876 who have lost their lives there.  To them and to their survivors at home and in the field Love and Gratitude for their sacrifice is their due.

        This will be a busy week end in Skyline.  The Skyline Area Volunteer Fire Department will have a live burn class Friday and Saturday relating to auto fires.  Friday will be the classroom work for the firefighters with an instructor from Jeff City.  Saturday they will have an actual auto fire demonstration and ‘practical.’  It should prove to be very interesting.  Observers will be welcome Saturday at a safe distance.

        Saturday will also be an excellent opportunity to do some ‘giving back.’  The area has long been benefited by Skyline School and particularly by eighth grade teacher Lannie Hinote.  A benefit Chili Supper has been organized to assist her with medical expenses.  It will start at the School at six in the evening.  There will be a pie auction that will include a super-sized coconut pie by Vanzant’s own blimp navigator and Pie Champion, Esther Wrinkles.  Esther is a big fan of the Kellys and will be sure to enjoy an evening of their music and several other groups as well.  There will be a silent auction and an opportunity to win a pony and many other surprises.  Mostly there will be a chance to express Love and Gratitude to a special person.  If folks cannot attend but still want to help they can contact Sharon Woods at 683-9074 or Helen at 683-7874.

        Opportunities, surprises, reasons to be Thankful and suggestions for the Missouri Song List are welcome at Champion Items, Rt. 2, Box 367, Norwood, MO 65717.  Examples of scandalous behavior of pigs (especially pictures) in parades can be e-mailed to Champion News.  To survey the detritus of the Champion Thanksgiving Day Parade, just go to Henson’s Store on the square where by that time Champions will once again be able to—‘Look on the bright side!